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Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
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Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
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Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. ~Tom Wilson
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Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
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They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
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Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
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Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
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The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
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Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
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Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
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Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
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Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. ~Tom Wilson
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You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
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I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
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Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
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Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
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We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
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Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
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I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
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We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
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We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
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Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again. ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
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Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
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Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
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There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik
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Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
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Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
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